I was reading an article in Psychology Today last night regarding Self-Sabotage (I’d include the link, but the issue just arrived and there’s no mention of it on the PT site yet), and I coincidentally notice a lot of it in my life recently.  Like the ebb and flow of life itself, doubt and self-sabotage come and go in waves. One week we’re operating on pure power – like the fire inside broke through our cracks and we’re burning to reach our goals.  The next week we’re discouraged, so we find something that “comforts” us – 90% of the time that comfort ends up derailing our progress.  The derailment makes giving up look that much more appealing.

In this light, I went searching for what people use, read, watch, and do to stay motivated in the face of challenges. I stumbled onto some amazing images, and I’d like to share them here for you all to enjoy.  I think I’ll make this a regular column here. “Get Inspired” is a great piece to make recurring, right

What images or quotes do you find keep you motivated? Do you have a favorite? Share yours in the comments below!

Technorati Tags: affirmations, attitude, awareness, being bold, clearing doubt, dream, faith, goals, happiness, inspiration, motivation, perception, personal power, positive thinking, reflection, resistance, success, wisdom

Today I came across Action for Happiness, a UK based non-profit organization that works to create change for the better in the world. They do this by educating and empowering people to discover and harness the power of what makes them happy. Moved by how much this spoke to me and my personal coaching mission, I created the first US based Meetup group. Action for Happiness – Chicagoland is the new home for stateside AFH help.

I have just started my journey with this, but I have BIG, BIG plans to bring this into the spotlight, both in my work, and in the global connections I have. Now I have another reason to get a flight to the UK. I encourage everyone to head to the Action for Happiness UK site, and pledge to be happy. It’s free, and the site is filled with resources and motivations to help you get started.

If you also happen to live in the Chicagoland area, I definitely recommend joining our meetup group HERE. Read more about the project, and get a taste for the incredible things to come!

I hope to see you all at our next meetup!

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you all!

Blake

The challenge has been set forth over at www.blakehammerton.com – my personal site for Applied Happiness Coaching (and hypnosis). The challenge is to be an everyday hero for 5 days (Wednesday through Sunday) and report back.  I invite you all to stand up for the common man, and practice acts of selflessness, kindness, courage and integrity.

This video blew my mind earlier this week, and it prompted the Everyday Hero Challenge.  I’m going to consider this a trial-run of the challenge. If it gets good reviews in the comments and on facebook, I’ll make it a regular event with prizes and awards.

So head over here and read about the challenge. Then leave your examples, thoughts, and heroic stories in the comments there!

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you!

Blake

Technorati Tags: appreciation, attitude, awareness, being bold, coaching, goals, gratitude, inspiration, lessons, personal power, reflection, success, teaching, wisdom

Three Days Left

The “Declare & Conquer” workshop is only three days away!  This Thursday night we’ll be at the Palatine Community Center revealing the secrets to overcoming obstacles and reaching what you truly desire in your life. This two-hour class is designed to help you define what you really want, discover what’s stopping you from getting it, and equip you with the tools and resources to make it happen.  Have you ever felt a little “stuck” and wondered how you were going to get moving again?  Has what you wanted been just out of reach? This is exactly what the workshop is designed to help change.  We’re going to introduce the tools of the extraordinary – the secrets of the movers and shakers in the world.  This is such a powerful class that we can’t believe we’re practically giving it away at $30 a person! Oh, and speaking of giving things away, we have gifts for every attendee, and a chance to win more stuff the day of the class!  Head over to our EVENTS page, and REGISTER!

Not in Palatine?

Fear not, friends.  We’re going to turn this into a downloadable course, and offer many of our subsequent classes as webinars in the future.  However, this is the last workshop for this year! In order to get the hands-on learning, interactive atmosphere, and the free gifts, you have to register and get to Palatine.  If you have any questions, please feel free to email Blake directly. We hope to see you all there!

Declare & Conquer Workshop – Thursday, October 28th 7-9pm
Palatine Community Center
250 E Wood Street
Palatine, IL 60067

With Excitement,
The Applied Happiness Team

P.S. If you add a friend when you register, we’ll take $5 off each registration!!  So tell your friends, spread the word, Like us on Facebook – get the message out there!

Technorati Tags: awareness, clearing doubt, coaching, facebook, goals, inspiration, lessons, motivation, personal power, reflection, success, teaching, workshop

Jay Shafer decided one day to remove the clutter from his world and start over.  He designed and built an 89 square foot home, and began living there. Leaving the ‘everything big’ lifestyle behind him, his life transformed. I love this story. It reminds me how frivolous some of our attachment to material goods can be. Does anyone really need a 20,000 square foot mansion? Maybe they do. I don’t know anyone with one, so I can’t just come out and ask. I’ll update this post if I ever find that answer.

This begs the question of what do we really need in our lives to be happy. It’s not so much about becoming a minimalist and throwing out everything but toilet paper and three outfits – that’s a little too frightening for most of us. Instead, it’s about removing the “noise” and “stuff” with which we all seem to fill our lives. It’s about pulling away from owning things just to own things.

Personally, I remember being younger and spending money on a whole bunch of things I found cool. Now I can’t remember a single thing I got that was important. And I certainly don’t have any of this cool “stuff” to show nowadays. Why did it all disappear? Was it not too expensive and therefore disposable? Was it simply misplaced? Stolen? What happened to all my cool stuff?!?!

It wasn’t truly important to me, so it didn’t stick around. Because it truly wasn’t that important, I didn’t miss it, and I didn’t replace it. Imagine all the things in your life you could sell off, throw out, or donate – stuff you really don’t need, won’t miss, and won’t replace if gone one day. The minimalist credo is similar to “waste not, want not” and is a great place to start.

This becomes MUCH easier after a values exercise. You get a solid sense of your values, what motivates you, and what you need to move forward. You can then ask what this “thing” brings you that you cannot be without. If it doesn’t fill that space inside you, it really doesn’t have to fill that space in your house.

Try your own version of living little. See how it goes, and let us know!

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you all!

Blake

Technorati Tags: appreciation, attitude, clearing, goals, inspiration, lesson, personal power, reflection, teaching, wisdom

Psychology Today has a brilliant article on America’s culture of envy, and wanting be, do, and have more. Moreover, it’s about our own judgements that we haven’t accomplished enough – regardless of what incredible feats we have completed. It rings so true with me because I can hear the parts of my mind screaming at me about what I haven’t done, and how I fail to measure up to people around me; but I also hear the voice that’s amazed with the things I have done when I measure them against my ability as a human being to do them. It’s about measuring your life against your internal dream – not against the celebutantes on TV.

“The Contender Syndrome is subtly different from envy. It’s more a sense of not living up to the best you, rather than not living up to the best Albert Einstein. Some scientists say the feeling of not reaching your potential comes from a discrepancy between the ‘actual self’ (who you are), the ‘ideal self’ (who you’d like to be), and the ‘ought self’ (who you think others want you to be). Troubles arise when your actual self doesn’t align with your other visions.”

Anything from parents or teachers telling you things like, “You can do it. You’re better/stronger/smarter than this.” can start the process of either pushing you to achieve, or create the gap between where you are and where you’d like to be. This gap is the big pickle. Some people never learned how to build a bridge from here (actual) to there (ideal). Often this gap can seem too big to bridge, or simply impossible because the talent needed to live that dream aren’t available. Hazel Markus, a Psychologist at Stanford University, disagrees with this.

“A lot of people think you need the talent. People who end up suffering, feeling like they could have been a contender, are those with the idea that talents are pretty much fixed, so they don’t figure out how to get from where they are to where they want to be,” says Markus. “They don’t even really think it’s possible, so they don’t put the work into it.”

How will you know you’ve achieved it? How do you know you haven’t yet? How do you know you’re not in denial about your achievement? A lot of people see the ideal self and hear the ought self, but can’t get a clear view of the actual self. They may actually be very close to their ideal state, but they can’t see the steps they’ve taken, and the successes they’ve had along the way. Their gap is still too big. One great way to bring your progress into light is to name the greatest pleasures in what you have or do, or the person you are. You’ll see that your values are in some of your greatest pleasures. There’s more to life than ‘keeping up with the Jones family’ and it involves celebrating your successes just as much as you celebrate other peoples’.

Take time to reflect on where you are now, and what you’ve done to get here. You may find that your actual self isn’t far from your ideal self at all. Celebrate that! Follow what makes you happy, and do the work to get there and beyond. Often real, focused work is what separates the contenders from the victors. Success is subjective, my friends. One man’s failure is another man’s success. It’s all about what makes you happy.

“If you’re doing something positive in the world, if you’re productive, if you’re a player; then you’re a success.”

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you all,

Blake

Reference: “I Coulda Been a Contender” by Abby Ellin. Psychology Today. August, 2010

Technorati Tags: envy, future self, gap, goals, ideal self, inspiration, motivation, self, struggle

It’s difficult to see the world in color if your mind only lets in black and white. The eyes are judgment-less lenses to the world. Our perception of what they record is the hindrance we often live by. One man gets laid off (in this economy? you’re kidding right?) and we may judge that as a tragedy. He, however, may see this as a perfect opportunity to pursue more time with his family while he decides his next direction. Our burden may be his blessing.

“Don’t think of organ donations as giving up part of yourself to keep a total stranger alive. It’s really a total stranger giving up almost all of themselves to keep part of you alive.” ~ Unknown

Life is about experience, and part of that is in the perspective you take to experience what you want. What you perceive is reality, right? When you focus on something – I mean, intently focus – the peripheral details disappear. Everyone has experienced the blindspot of reality when intently focused. When you fail to perceive the details around you, and instead focus on what’s directly in front of you, the entire world can change.

This is such a cool place to play for coaches and people who like to challenge circumstance with personal awareness. Many people spend their lives in ‘victim’ roles, and can’t see a way out. “These things always happen to me.” “I’m just unlucky.” “I’ll never make anything like that happen – that dream is just plain out of reach.”

We’re going to play a little game now. Look below and follow the pink dots around the circle. Then stare at the black + in the middle for a few moments. What happens?

When you first see this image, you see the pink dots rotating clockwise. After you spend a few moments staring at the black + in the center of the image, you’ll see a green dot appear to be rotating in place of the pink one. If you keep focusing on that + in the center, the pink dots will slowly, but completely disappear. Wow, if this doesn’t ever prove we don’t always see what’s really there!

This is such a fun lesson, but it’s also up there in importance. I like to use this exercise with clients that see past their own perceived mistakes to make new things happen. I also like to break it out when too much judgment is being held to a perceived event. Sometimes we all focus so intently on the negative that all the pink positive pieces disappear. On the other side of the coin, sometimes we simply can’t focus on the goal, that we simply can’t see any green (money, satisfaction, time, positive qualities) at all. It can be very discouraging.

If you ever have trouble focusing on the goal because all you find yourself surrounded by are pink dots, come back here and focus until they all just fade away! It’s a beautiful life, my friends. Have a great time, and keep your eyes on the direction(s) you want to go, and you’ll never have trouble seeing what you want to.

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you all.

Blake

Technorati Tags: awareness, focus, fun, game, illusion, perception, personal power, perspective

“Once an old woman came to Buddha and asked him how to meditate. He told her to remain aware of every movement of her hands as she drew the water from the well, knowing that if she did, she would soon find herself in that state of alert and spacious calm that is meditation.”

“Water, if you don’t stir it, will become clear; the mind left unaltered will find its own natural peace.”

Sometimes we get so caught up in the rattle of everyday life that an overwhelming blindness washes over us. We’re blind to the true nature of the world around us, our place in it, and what we really want for ourselves. We are so in tune with the ‘noise’ that the voice inside becomes inaudible, and we often end up somewhere we don’t feel we belong. Some of us lose our way from time to time, right?

Stillness is such a powerful tool for reconnecting to that little voice. When the mind tunes out the noise, and instead, listens to the calm repetition of breathing, the soul can often take the moment and speak up – often with such clarity. Mindfulness meditation is an easy way to reach this stillness. I personally use an activity (one in which I can focus, and be on autopilot) as a catalyst to stillness. I wash and wax my car to ‘tune out’ the noise.

The calm I get in slowly covering the car in soap and rinsing her clean is immense. I’ve done this a few hundred times, so it’s nothing I really need to concentrate on, but I couldn’t have a conversation while doing it either – and why would I want to?!? I let my mind slowly shut off by focusing on the movement of my hands across the paint, and the shine that I reveal. Before long, I can hear my heart telling me how satisfying this activity is, and what parts of my life it also feels satisfied. I get a chance to really reflect without the rattle of my mind coming into play. This stillness of my mind is priceless.

In the Karate Kid movies, Mr. Miyagi puts Daniel(son) to work by having him wax the car and paint the fence. This not only teaches him Kata Karate movements, but it introduces him to stillness and mindful meditation. It’s often in the stillness that we come to great realizations. It’s almost cliche now, but how many times have you fallen in love with someone in the stillness between the two of you? Think about it!

The homework this time is to practice stillness, my friends. If you know how to meditate, please do that and listen to what your mind and body say when you tune the ‘noise’ out. If you do not know how to meditate, try to simply sit quietly with your eyes closed and concentrate on your breathing only. Concentrate on breathing slowly in your nose, and out your mouth. Soon enough your mind will unravel from its grip on the rattle, and you’ll find peace. That’s where you’ll also hear that inner voice speak to you. It’s incredible what he/she has to say sometimes.

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you all,

Blake

Technorati Tags: appreciation, attitude, awareness, Buddha, gratitude, happiness, lesson, love, peace, stillness, teaching, wisdom

Free Coaching Session!

With 2010 coming to the half-way point in the next couple of weeks, are you happy with where your year has taken you?  Are there things you’d love to change, improve, increase, or achieve?  Maybe you would only like a little clarity about where you are and where you feel you’re headed on this crazy winding road.  Have you had a day where you left your office for some lunch and thought, “what am I doing?” or “is this really all there is?” or even “man, it would be so incredible if I could only (fill-in the blank)”?

Coaching is such a powerful place to turn to when you’re looking for some insight and fulfillment in your life.  Maybe you’ve looked into getting a coach, but you doubted your ability to afford it…

GREAT NEWS!

We’re giving away 30 minute coaching sessions!  No, really, we are!  F-R-E-E !

Not only are we giving away the first 30 minute session, we’ve discounted our fees to help get you closer to your dream without taking away your savings!  Head to the contact page and send us a message to set-up a free coaching call (or face-to-face meeting), and take us for a test drive!  If you feel like you could benefit from having your own incredible coach, we are offering 30 minute sessions for $25 each for the first 90 days!  Imagine as much as 12 complete weeks of personalized attention, focus, and support to help you discover your best self and show you how to create S-M-A-R-T action plans to get you moving forward.

FOR PEANUTS!

For those of you thinking, “C’mon, there’s no such thing as a free lunch,” truly, there’s no risk. No contracts, no gimmicks, no strings, nothing. The time is yours,and the decision after your session is yours. No hard sell. No fine print. NONE.

Head over to the assessment page and see what you, personally, come up with. They’re free too. If you find some area of your life you might like to improve, we would be more than happy to give you the free session to touch on it. Call 847-754-9615 or send a message our way to set-up your FREE session today! 

As a bonus for signing up for your free session, we’ll send you the Applied Happiness Inspired Action Workbook at no charge! This 30 page workbook will help you get a head start on what motivates you, and what might be holding you back from getting what you want.  This is $10 value, absolutely free.

Don’t wait! This offer only runs through August!

Call or write us today, and discover what a coach can add to your life!

Audentes Fortuna Iuvat – Fortune Favors the Bold.

- The Applied Happiness Team

Technorati Tags: appreciation, attitude, awareness, being bold, clearing, coaching, gratitude, happiness, lessons, love, personal power, positive thinking, success, teaching, wisdom

Sometimes the most growth comes from someone asking a powerful question. Suddenly, everything seems to make a little more sense, and we know what we must do from this point forward. There are no right or wrong answers to these questions. They are just meant to get your wheels turning, and maybe help you see the decisions you’ve been making, and the ones you’d like to make from now on.

1. We learn from our mistakes, yet we’re always so afraid to make one. Why?

2. What risk would you take if you knew you could not fail?

3. What is your greatest strength? Have any of your recent actions demonstrated this strength?

4. What are the top five things you cherish in your life?

5. How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

6. When do you stop calculating risk and rewards, and just do it?

7. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?

8. What do you most connect with? Why?

9. What one piece of advice would you offer a newborn child?

10. Which is worse – failing or never trying?

11. Why do we do things we dislike, and like the things we never seem to do?

12. What are you avoiding?

13. What is the one job/cause/activity that could get you out of bed happily for the rest of your life? Are you doing it now?

14. When it’s all said and done, will you have said more than you’ve done?

15. What are you most grateful for?

16. What would you say is one thing you’d like to change in the world?

17. Do you find yourself influencing your world, or it influencing you?

18. Are you doing what you believe in, or settling for what you’re doing?

19. What are you committed to?

20. Which worries you more – doing things right, or doing the right things?

21. If joy became the national currency, what kind of work would make you wealthy?

22. Have you been the kind of friend you’d want as one?

23. Do any of the things that used to upset you a few years ago matter at all today? What’s changed?

24. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you enjoy doing?

25. What you sacrifice the most to be, do, or possess?

26. Really, what do you have to lose if you go for it?

27. How different would your life be if there wasn’t any criticism in the world?

28. We’re always making choices. Are you choosing for your story, or for someone else’s?

Powerful questions can change the very fiber of our construction. They give us a chance to challenge our own ideals, and perhaps shed some light on what we are and are not committed to. It’s important to understand that we’re always committed to something. If it’s not success on out on our own, it’s staying safe in the comfortable success of someone else. If we’re not committed to creating our opportunities, we’re committed to floating around, hoping, waiting, and wishing for circumstance. What are you committed to?

Peace, Love, and a million successes to you, my friends!

Blake

Technorati Tags: inquiry, inspiration, motivation, personal power, powerful questions